soulsearching

Emotional rollercoaster
2:31 a.m. - Saturday, Jul. 22, 2006

I've been feeling very stressed up and I guess that is what's making me emotional. Fought with a friend just now. Both of us being sarcastic to each other. I contacted that friend with good intentions in the beginning, but it went wrong somehow. Now I'm extremely pissed. But sad at the same time, cos we fought. It's irreversible now. Work is getting to me, we're short handed and I'm dead tired from working alone most of the time. I need a break, and just nice, I have a company trip to Genting for 3 days. Good time for me to relax and catch up on my rest. But once I'm back, I'll have to feel sad again, cos I'm losing another friend. Pamela is going to Australia to study on thurs. I'm going to miss her kookyness.. She makes me laugh with the things she say. Another clubbing kaki gone. I'm sad all over again..

Ass like that!
9:46 a.m. - Tuesday, Jul. 18, 2006

I am super duper tired. Woke up late today cos was out late yesterday night. Supposed to be up at 5am to get ready for work and all, but WTF, I woke up at 6.30am instead. And I start work at 7. MAJOR PANIC ALERT! I got dressed and was out of the house in record time. like 5 mins I think. Hopped into a cab and rushed to work. Got here at 7.02am. Phew. But members were already waiting for me. Sooooooooo paiseh. So I did the necessary things and then hid in my office till the early birds left. Then I came out. Shit man. Sure kanna complain. Oh well.. I won't talk about work anymore, work is boring.

My right ass hurts. Major. Cos yesterday my mum was disturbing my brother, and she couldn't manage to take him down and asked for my help, so I did. Once he saw that I got up from my seat, he ran, so I pounced on him. But alas! The momentum of him running away and me pouncing on him brought us both crashing to the ground. My right butt hit the floor hard and I lay paralyzed on the floor cos it hurt too much to even comtemplate moving. That was yesterday afternoon. And my ass is still hurting now. I need a massage. Hehe.

Welcome to Zouk!
12:43 p.m. - Tuesday, Jun. 27, 2006

Last friday, my mum and I met up with my aunt and cousin for a buffet lunch at Sakura! Loads of gossip over food. Ahhh.. Life is good. Lol. Then after that, we went shopping! Ahhh.. Life is even better! Haha.. Took loads of pictures man! Here's some of them..

Look at my mum's retarded face.

What does these two pictures prove? I'm the only one who knows how to smile for the camera properly. Hehe!

My cousin, my aunt and I

My aunt and I. Hmmmm, she doesn't look too happy taking a picture with me.

Look at how much jellies I stole from the buffet! HEhe. Not supposed to la, but it was very very nice...

During dinner that same day, Adeline asked if I wanted to wanted to go Zouk. At first I said no cos I was out with my aunt and cousin. Just as I sent her that message, my cousin received a call from her friend asking if she wanted to go Zouk for a fashion show by invites. And she asked if I wanted to go along! So in the end I said ok! Adeline was going for the fashion show also, so I met her there. Saw Royston Tan there also, Na Bei! didn't recognize me at first never mind, then after that blame me for him not being able to recognize me cos he said I put on make up, then look like KTV hostess. What kind of stupid reasoning is that! Somemore that day no make up lor! Idiot. HAha.. Took loads of picture again!

My cousin and I. While still sober.

My cousin and her friends.

Adeline and I. Yes, I know I'm red. I've already started drinking!

The stage with video playing. Took damn blardy long for the fashion show to start.

Cam whoring cos we were bored waiting for the show to start.

The fashion show was put up by new local designers. fru fru & tigerlily, stray and murder I think.

Guys aglore!!

My cousin's friend modelling.

Cute guy alert!

*swoons!*

Adeline and her cousin Bernard.

Hmmm, why does it seem that her cousin is trying to kiss her??

Wahh.. Now Adeline wants, he don't want.

Finally, got this two kids to settle down and take a picture properly.. Lol.

Yay! Sufyan's finally here!

They hate each other.

All in all, a very FUN night!

VERY IMPORTANT AND SHOCKING NEWS!
As my cousin and I were entering Zouk, at the stairs where they give you the chop on the hand, one of the guys in the jacket(what are they anyway? bouncers or what?) said to us, "Hi! Welcome to Zouk!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
My cousin and I got the shock of our lives! First time leh! OMG! That has got to be like some momentous event in the history of Zouk. As rare as seeing faries in your garden, which is impossible. Wow. Damn. Should have bought 4D.

Delipotato
1:15 a.m. - Friday, Jun. 23, 2006

Met up with Carol and Niza for dinner today after work. Had our favourite delipotato! Had a hard time finding a delifrance that wasn't a bistro. Finally I went online and surprise, surprise! Found Delifrance's website! Found a list of places that still haven't been converted to Bistro, turns out that they are called Cafes. Anyhow, we went to Heartland Mall for that. I got a lil bored, so took Niza's nokia phone and started fooling around with it cos forgetful me rushed out of the house without my camera. And then Carol started to tell us a sad story.. But our reactions to it.. Hmmmm, is a bit odd.

In the process of sad story telling by Carol. But we're smiling.. Hmmm..

I don't know why she laughing. Sad story still..

Madly laughing! Dunno why also.

Story teller's rating? 4/10. FAILED

Strike off story teller as a possible occupation Carol. Try comedian maybe..

**********************

Neeta's coming back! *excited Excited EXCITED!!!!!!*

Who stole my socks?!
12:15 p.m. - Thursday, Jun. 22, 2006

I forgot my socks. Was in too much of a hurry this morning to leave the house so that I would not be late. Again. Damn.. In the end blew $8.20 on cab fare. Then as I was changing, I realized I forgot my socks. Wah lao.. Have to wear my shoes without socks. Eeee. Feel so yucky. So I took off my shoes at every opportunity I could. But I'm working out later! How sia. So instead of running as per orginal plan, I'll do X-trainer then abs exercise and weights. With lots of stretching. Haha.. See, lots of workout that doesn't involve shoes! Maybe I should do yoga, don't need shoes at all! Haha. Ok, that's stupid, cos I don't know yoga. Today is a very slack day. So that I was sitting behind the counter and dozed off without realizing it until a loud bang from someone doing chest presses woke me up. Thank goodness I didn't drool. =D Yay! Tomorrow off! Going to Sakura to eat again! With mum, aunty and cousin! Gossip session again.. Woohoo! Yum yum..

OUCH
5:52 p.m. - Saturday, Jun. 17, 2006

Finally got my birkies from Gretchen, but to my utter dismay! Its the wrong size for me! I need one size bigger cos it hurts my feet abit when I have to walk fast. Damn. Now my mum is saying that she will be wearing the birkies since it fits her perfectly. In your dreams Mum! I guess I need to buy another pair.. Another one else wanna buy? In bulk cheaper.. Tell me k??

NEETA'S COMING BACK! *EXCITED!*

..
1:21 p.m. - Friday, Jun. 09, 2006

Sooo.. What do you guys think of this new template? Better? I kinda like it myself. But still on the lookout for nice PURPLE templates tho.. Lol. So as a compromise, I put the title of the diary as.. "I'm the Purple Goddess". Hehe! Help me look out for nice purple ones k?? Then tell me, I will give you lots and lots of kisses. Hehe!

I need...... SLEEP
8:26 a.m. - Wednesday, Jun. 07, 2006

At work now, after only 2 hours of slep. So you can just imagine my concentration level.. Got home at 11 last night after closing up the gym at 10, and then I had to open up the gym this morning at 7! Wah lao! So fucked up man.. Ok la, I have to share some of the blame I guess. Stayed up till 3 fiddling with my iriver, downloading the songs into it and stuff.. Think I'm going to sleep later at 12 during my break, don't wanna eat. Sleep more important.. Lol. Going for a manicure later.. Hehe! So excited! Been awhile since I pampered myself. The last manicure I had was in April, for my birthday.. Haven't decided where I'll go for it tho.. Hmmmmm.. With a growling stomach(haven't had breakfast), tired eyes and a very boring morning cos there isn't much people in the gym, I can tell time will go very slooooooowwwwwwlllllyyyyyyyy....

On a lighter note, Yay! gonna get my birkies soon!!

Exposed!
1:02 a.m. - Thursday, Jun. 01, 2006

Show those of you who haven't seen me in a long time something..
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Hehe! Got it about 3 weeks ago.. When I told friends about my plan to get it, almost all of them vehemently protested! All except one.. Adeline. Her reaction? "Izzit? Orh, ok.." Like don't really care. *sad* But I went ahead with it anyway. But before that, everyone was trying to scare me with horror stories of tongue piercings gone wrong and the discomfort I'll feel and stuff.. The worst I'd heard is Chak telling me that there will be alot of blood and him saying, "I bet you sure faint. Tongue will swell and all, then cannot talk properly, have to eat porridge for a week at least!" But guess what? None of that happened! I could talk (almost) normally, I was already eating famous cookies that very night, and I didn't even eat porridge! *sticks out tongue to all the nay sayers!*

The Great Singapore Sale is here! I bought a couple of shirts, some Body Shop items and a pair of purple heels!! I showed them to my brother, Leonard, and said, "Very nice right??!!" He just looked at me and said, "You got not enough shoes ah?" But the next moment, he said, "Eh, I wanna try." I was skeptical, worried that he will break them, but in the end let him try..

OMG! Look at how gigantic his feet is! Spoil my shoes already la!!

Attempting to stand and walk in my heels..

Failing miserably!

He tried to walk but at the first step, wobbled, then fell backwards, knocking the hangers on the bench all over the floor in the process. See! Not so easy to walk in heels one ok?! It takes skill!

Let me show you how its done..

Taa Daaaaaaaaaaa!

My Dream Guy.. *Sigh*
3:14 p.m. - Friday, May. 26, 2006

I found my dream guy!

Archangel aka Angel. Otherwise also known as Ben Foster. Ok ok, I know, he isn't extremely cute, but he's pleasing to the eye, and best of all.. He has wings!! Can you imagine all the possibilities with a guy like that??! If you're late for class, he can just fly you there. If the lift is broken and you have to climb like 20 floors, he can fly you up! If you're tired from walking, he can carry you home! Can't get a cab? No problem! He'll bring you wherever you want to go! Woo Hoo! Imagine all the hassle and money you'll save with a guy like this! I wantttt..... *drools*
Yes Adeline, Iceman is kinda cute, butttttttt... Can he fly??!! NooOOOoooOO! So, my Angel is better. Wahhaha! And I haven't show you my Shaolin Finger of Fury yet.. What we showed you last night was just a preview, wait for the real thing, then you'll know what irritating is. Wahahhaha!!
Ok, I shall end off this entry with.....
I LIKEEEEEEEE ANGEL!!! *muacks!* Hehe!

Off to parrrttttyyyy!!
7:18 p.m. - Wednesday, May. 24, 2006

Ok, lots of people have been asking what's wrong and stuff. Nothing major. It's just a passing phase like Neeta said. Thanks babe for the support. Anyway, back on talking terms with my family now. Still abit strained, but lots better. We just avoid talking about any thing that will cause friction. Simple mundane stuff makes up the bulk of our conversation now. I'm finally off tomorrow. Off to parrrrtttyyy tonight! That is if the rest of the girls can get their act together and give me a definate answer.. Come on la, just how often do I get a off day on thurs??! Can make it happening with me! I'll promise to make it loads of fun! *wink wink*

FURIOUS
9:56 p.m. - Sunday, May. 21, 2006

I hate my life at home. Wish I could run away. I never want to come home, and whenever I'm home, I wanna leave, even if there isn't anywhere to go. Anything just so that I will not see them. The very sight and sound of them is grating on my ears. Asking me stupid questions, doing stupid things. Other people may think that my family is quite cool or funny or whatever, but come live my life for a day, I bet you everything I have that you'll wish you never did it.

I HATE MY FAMILY

Miss Rich
3:38 p.m. - Saturday, May. 20, 2006

I'm pissed off with my parents. Since yesterday. Delayed going home after work so that I could avoid them. Woke up this morning and saw them too. But just ignored them again. Ridiculous the things they are asking from me. Not that I'm unwillingly to give, but its atrocious! I'm so pissed that I don't even want to talk about it anymore. And I don't want to see them for like the next ten thousand years. Sigghhhhhh.. I wish I was born rich.

Looook!
9:41 a.m. - Monday, May. 15, 2006

Oh wow.. I did something shocking. Those that have seen it or found out about it screamed at me. But well, its over and done with already, so we all have to live with it.. Ok guys?? lol.. Aniwae, work has been pretty alright. Settling down, getting into the swing of things. I'm getting more rest now than when I was not working! Weird. Haha. But I miss the prata sessions. Especially suddenly deciding to meet up in the middle of the night for prata and teh.. Without caring that I have to work the nest day. HAiz. But with power comes responsibility. And the power I'm refering to is EARNING power. Ahah. Which means... MONnnneyyyy!! Counting down to pay day! 11 more days!

Out with the old, in with the new.
4:35 a.m. - Saturday, May. 06, 2006

Not sure if you guys know, but I've got a full time job now! Yay for me! Working at SRC as a fitness instructor.. The working environment is all male, with me being the only girl.. Again. Haiz. I seem destined to be always surrounded by a majority of guys in most of my workplaces.. But overall, its quite a nice place to work in, pretty slack, walk around the gym,talk to members, occasionally help them out with certain exercises.. Other than that, nothing else. Can become quite boring, so always have to find things to do.. Right now, my main motivation is counting down to pay day!! Hehe. Gonna be sooooo happy once it comes. =P I'm gonna go mad shopping!!!!!

Lucky me
2:58 a.m. - Tuesday, May. 02, 2006

To all my darlings: THANK YOU! All the encouraging words are helping me to go on.. I'm loads better now. I'm sooo lucky to have friends like you all. Love you guys. =)

Jaded
1:24 a.m. - Saturday, Apr. 29, 2006

My heart will probably never be whole ever again. I was cynical about love before, but now, I truely believe that true love doesn't exists at all. I deserve better, I know I do. Your loss, not mine, cos you do not know how to treasure me.. I will move on with my head held high.

But under all these bravado, my heart still weeps..

Birthday Celebrations Day 2
1:52 a.m. - Tuesday, Apr. 25, 2006

Ok, finally got the chance to use the computer! So here goes..
Day 2-BBQ night 8/4/06
I woke up with no idea how I got home and why I was sleeping on the floor of my dining room. Was supposed to go back to the chalet, but I must have been sooooo drunk that they decided to take me home instead. No idea how my top was changed too.. Hmmm, must have been my mum. Stumbled upstairs to my room with loud groans, stubbed my toe many times along the way.. Dragged myself to the bathroom where I stood under the shower with cold water on full blast for at least 10 minutes without doing anything at all. Could feel my head throbbing, like there was an invisible disco still going on in my head. I finally washed up and got out of the bathroom where I found my brother standing outside with his ear plastered to the bathroom door. He looked at me and said, "I thought you'd drowned." My dad said to me, "I'm not happy about this, not happy at all." Oops! Hehe.. I got changed as quickly as I could so that I could fall on my bed and sleep somemore. Any movements I made felt like the whole world was spinning. By far the worst hangover I have every had. And I swore to myself, the last hangover of this multitude for the rest of my life! It was so bad that I couldn't straighten up properly, made me wanna puke all over again. Couldn't finish the food my dad bought for me too, took like 4 or 5 nibbles of it and then was repelled by it. Even my usual hangover cure of carrot juice and panadol didn't work at all! I even drank ginseng tea which made me even sicker. Seemed like I was gonna spend the rest of the day in a comatose state. The taxi ride to Sentosa was a nightmare, with the uncle swerving and jam-braking the whole way. I arrived and rushed to the room to puke, then proceeded to fall on the bed with Adeline, Gaffur and Wei Xiong telling me all the silly things I did while I was drunk. Which I am not gonna repeat. Haha! Ask someone else for them if you wanna know! Soon after, Niza, her bf Zul, Carol and Chun Wei came. Niza and Carol were soooooo sweet as to bake me a cheesecake that was absolutely delicious! That became my hangover cure! I was feeling like crap when they came, after eating the cheesecake, I felt loads better! I swear!! My miracle cure.. Hehe! I got changed and headed to the bbq pit where the chef that I hired to bbq for us already had a fire going and was already cooking the food. Some of my relatives were already there, along with friends and some family friends. So I was kept very very busy that night, shuttling back and forth between friends, relatives and family friends.. Suddenly, my mum and I realized one very important thing, we forgot to buy A CAKE!! Jensen and Huat was soooo good as to go out and buy them.. Hehe. Thanks guys!! Finally came the cutting of the cake. Took loads of pictures, with loads of people. Alot of confusion going on with alot of cameras flashes. All I had to do was stand with the cake and SMILE! Felt like a celebrity cos at the bbq area, our group was the biggest with at least 40 people. So when the birthday song was sung, everyone else at the bbq area stopped what they were doing and stared at us.. And finally, came the main event of the night, dumping me into the swimming pool. Cos I was sitting in a chair behind the cake, my poly seniors and classmates suddenly grabbed the chair and brought me to the swimming pool which wasn't far away! I was screaming all the way!! I wasn't gonna go in without a fight that's for sure.. Everyone kept saying "See her pockets got anything or not!" or "Her phone! Her phone!!" Actually, I didn't have anything on me at all, but just so that I could prolong going into the pool, I kept screaming "my phone!". Finally, I got tired of them molesting me in search of my phone, I resigned myself to my fate and said, "Stop molesting me la! I got nothing in my pockets!" Whereupon they threw me into the pool with great enthusiasm! So mean.. I surfaced, choking and cursing that them. Lol. But that was not all, I went into the pool a grand total of... 5 times!! The second time was cos I went around hugging people and when I tried to hug Gaffur, he pushed me into the pool. The third time was when I surfaced from the second pool dip, and my aunt said, 'Granny say don't play already.' So I got out from the pool think, 'So nice, my Granny protecting me.' And everyone else quieted down, thinking that my Granny was angry.. But... As my Granny stepped up to me, she said,'You're ok right?' I replied,'Ya.' Where she then promptly gave me a hard nudge to try to send me back into the pool. I tottered on the edge, arms pinwheeling wildly to try and regain some balance, but my aunt stepped my and pushed me, sending me splashing into the pool. Damn! I climbed out feeling soo betrayed by my Granny! My own Granny did this to me! Everyone was like kow-towing to her and clapping, with my Granny grinning broadly, waving to them as if she was Queen. I was at a loss for words. The fourth time I forget what I was trying to do, probably send someone into the pool also, but turns out Gaffur pushed me in. Again. But the good thing was, after he pushed me in, he turned around and found my dad behind him, whereupon, my dad then pushed him into the pool also. Wahahha!! Revenge! At least my efforts were not in vain! The fifth time I went into the pool was while I was trying to drag Arzme in. While they had him on the floor trying to take out all his phone and wallet, Gaffur sneaked up behind me and pushed me in. Yes, yet again.. Haiz. I was exhausted when I climbed out of the pool. Well, the entertaiment for the night certainly pleased everyone, seemed like they had the time of their lives. Oh well, I have to admit, it was pretty damn funny thinking back.. What a memory. After I washed up and changed, went back down to say bye to all my friends and relatives for coming. That night, Adeline, Lijun, Gret, JY, Chak, Sufyan, Dan Ong, Wei Xiong, Pam, Royston, Gaffur and I stayed in the chalets. Since I booked the kampung hut and the superior room, more people could stay over.. We talked late into the night, reminiscing over secondary school days and the stupid stuffs we did.. A very satisfying and fun day! Luuurve it! =P Videos of my pool dips are below, but unfortunately, only have 2. The first one and last one. Enjoy! I know you will, all you evil people.. Haha!
First Pool Dip
5th Pool Dip

Birthday Celebrations Day One
3:06 p.m. - Tuesday, Apr. 24, 2006

Ok ok, long overdue update on my birthday. It just seems that all the anticipation for my birthday celebration has sizzled out and I'm back to my lazy self again. Lol. Alright, here goes the update on my birthday!

Day One-Clubbing Night 7/4/06
My mum and I met Gaffur and Wei Xiong to go Sentosa to pick up the keys and stuff. Had to get everything ready for the next night's bbq also. We also deposited our bags at the chalet cos the plan was to go back to Sentosa after clubbing. So after much rushing, we finally got out of Sentosa at about 4+ or 5 and had dinner before returning home. Once home, the heat was on to get ready in time!! I bathed and got ready with an hour to spare, soooo.. I watched TV! Hee.. Finally I was ready but no sign of Gaffur or Wei Xiong. They were supposed to come my place so we could all leave together with Adeline coming to pick us up since we all stayed so near each other.. Finally, about 10 mins later, they arrived, all panting and sweating. Urghh. Haha. Finally! We were on our way to MOS! Reached at about 9.40pm, with my cousins Jac, Jeremy and his gf, Crystal waiting for us already. I went ahead to make payment for 2 bottles of Volka and a bottle of Chivas. My god, it cost a whooping $684!! Well, I turn 21 only once! We went in and our table was situated in Smoove Room, near the aeroplane seats! Cool having a table of my own.. Haha. Saw Prada also! He was working that night, but in main arena. Somemore it was his birthday the next day! Sould be him celebrating, not me.. Haha. Left my cousins with the drinks and the rest of us went to have a bite first. Met Vanessa and Sean from Planet at Starbucks also. Apparently they were there for me. Which I didn't know. Surprise Surprise! While we were eating, Daniel msged, saying that he was on his way already. Another surprise cos I wasn't holding out any hopes of him coming as he had to go Taiwan that very night, and thus missing out on all my celebrations. But he DID come, and I was happy. =D So once we were inside, met JY and Yuan Wei also, so at least Dan wasn't that lonely. People starting trickling in and all of a suden, there were soooo many people! Some of which I didn't even know! Hmmmm... People from Planet that came was Nicholas, his gf Novie, Aszly, his 2 girl friends, Vanessa, Celia, Patrick, Sean, Colin, his gf, Skye, Jack, Jeremy, Kasno, Rafizal, Candy.. Erm, not sure if anymore came. Too many people!! Friends of my own were the usual clubbing gang of Gret, Daniel Ong, Sufyan, Chak, Gaffur, Adeline. Specials appearances of Ginny, Qorrine and Wei Xiong surprised me! Not sure if I left anyone out.. Halfway, Daniel had to go to catch his flight. Well, at least I gt to see him before he went off. Sad.. But not for long cos but by that time, liquor was flowing, everyone was making me drink and drink and drink till I was soooooooo tipsy! But I had lotsa fun! As expected I got drunk. I remember Colin bringing me to the bar and us drinking quite a few shots together, with him saying, "Its ur 21st! Must enjoy!' Then proceeding to drink even more. The last thing I remember was Jack giving me this orange coloured drink called AK41. I recalled saying 'No', him saying 'YEs!' Me, 'NO!' Him, 'YEs!' Me, 'ok, drink together.' What happened after that? Can't for the life of me remember.. From what I heard from the others, I had to be carried out of the club by JY cos I was dead drunk. No idea how I got home, no idea what I looked like. Haha. If you guys want more info on that, gotta ask the rest. But really, thanks to my good friends, they got me home safely! Muacks to you all! Ok, end of entry for day one. My bro's bugging me to use the computer. I'll update later or tomorrow. Photos are up at www.bubbles.photosite.com. Not complete though, some are still with friends who haven't sent them over yet. Once I get them, it'll be uploaded. Stay tuned!!